WHERE'S THE LOVE? (A CONFESSION)

SO, YOU PROBABLY THINK THIS IS GONNA BE SOME PESSIMISTIC OR CYNICAL, Z-RO TYPE RANT, BUT IT ISN'T.  I JUST WANNA SAY THIS.  I UNDERSTAND THE WAY THINGS ARE FOR WORKING FOLKS.  I TOO, HAVE A FULL TIME JOB, AND IN MY SPARE TIME, I TRY TO BALANCE, THIS BLOG, ARTWORK, FAMILY TIME, AND SLEEP.  I AM APART OF THE WORKING CLASS.  I AM TRYING TO TRANSITION INTO THIS DREAM OF CREATING THINGS FOR A LIVING.  IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN A DREAM OF MINE, TO PAINT, DRAW, DESIGN TSHIRTS AND SKATEBOARDS, SCUPLT, ETC.  I HAVE ALWAYS HAD THESE CREATIVE JUICES FLOWING INSIDE OF ME, THAT WANTED TO COME OUT.  I WANT TO MAKE A MOVIE, AND WRITE A BOOK, ONE DAY.  YEAH, IT GETS DEEP.  HOWEVER, I HAVE THIS JOB SITUATION GOING ON RIGHT NOW.  TRUTH BE TOLD, I STARTED LATE.  I SHOULD'VE BEGAN ATTEMPTING TO REALIZE THIS DREAM EARLY ON, BUT, I WASTED A LOT OF TIME BELIEVING THAT IT WOULDN'T AMOUNT TO ANYTHING.  SO I BASICALLY NEVER TRIED, AND ACCEPTED THE FACT THAT I WOULD NEVER ATTAIN THE DREAM AND WITH ALL THE ISSUES IN THE WORLD, MY SHIT WAS MEANINGLESS.  IT WAS A MISERABLE EXISTENCE, LEMME TELL YOU.  THEN, ONE DAY, I DECIDED TO TRY, BASED ON SOMETHING MY SON SAID TO ME (YES, I SAY THIS EVERYTIME, BUT IT'S TRUE).  FROM THEN ON, IT BECAME SOMETHING.  I WENT THRU, MANY CHANGES IN MY MIND AND IN MY ATTITUDE TOWARD LIFE, AND AT ONE POINT, FELT IT WAS SELFISH TO CONCENTRATE ON MY DREAMS, AND THAT I SHOULD FOCUS ON MY FAMILY.  THE SECOND MAJOR ATTITUDE, WAS THAT I WAS GOING TO RELEASE WHO I WAS INTERNALLY, BUT, NOT FOR PROFIT, JUST BECAUSE IT WAS WHO I AM.  THE IDEA OF BECOMING A WORKING ARTIST OR BUSINESSMAN, WAS A DEAD ISSUE.

I BECAME LOST, SERIOUSLY.  LIKE A MAN AT SEA, WITH NO MAP, I HAD BECOME TRULY LOST.  ONE DAY, MY BROTHER DECIDES HE WANTS TO START A RAP GROUP, AND HONESTLY, THE DREAMS BEGAN TO RE-MATERIALIZE AT THAT POINT.  ONE OF THE THINGS, I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO WAS RAP.  I HAVE NO MUSICAL TALENT, BUT, PEOPLE THINK I RAP OK AND THAT WAS ENOUGH FOR ME TO TRY.  FROM THEN ON, IT HAS BEEN A NON-STOP, DREAM CHASE.  I HAVE BEEN FORTUNATE TO BE APART OF A HIP-HOP ALBUM, AND I HAVE BEEN FORTUNATE ENOUGH, TO SELL ALMOST EVERY PAINTING, I'VE EVER DONE, AND I HAVE BEEN FORTUNATE TO SELL A GANG OF SHIRTS THAT I HAVE DESIGNED.  I AM NOT DONE, THOUGH.  I HAVE OTHER IDEAS.  THIS STEAMROLL OF CREATIVITY NEVER STOPS.  EVEN NOW, AS I TYPE THIS, I HAVE THIS DRAGON I'VE BEEN WORKING ON, IN 30 MIN. INCREMENTS, FOR LIKE WEEKS NOW.  SO, REALLY, IT NEVER STOPS.  HOWEVER, THE DREAMS ARE BIGGER THAN JUST ARTWORK, AND CLOTHING, AND MUSIC.  I WANT TO AFFECT MY COMMUNITY AS WELL, BUT, IN DUE TIME.  I USE SOCIAL MEDIA ON A DAILY BASIS TO PUSH THIS BRAND, WHICH IS MORE THAN A BRAND, BUT, A MINDSET.  I HAVE MET SO MANY PEOPLE, WHO, AFTER DISCOVERING US GOING OUT AND TRYING TO ATTAIN OUR DREAMS....GO OUT AND ATTEMPT THEIRS, IT SHOWS ME, PEOPLE ARE CATCHING ON.

SO, WHEN, I TELL YOU THAT I UNDERSTAND WHAT IT'S LIKE TO SEE SOMETHING, YOU REALLY LIKE, BUT, CAN'T AFFORD IT.  BELIEVE ME, I KNOW.  I HAVE MET, PLENTY OF PEOPLE AND BRANDS, THAT DO, SOME REALLY COOL STUFF, BUT, WHAT I CAN'T DO IN MONEY, I DO IN WORD.  IF I DO HAVE THE MONEY, INSTEAD OF GOING FOR THE LARGE MARKET BRAND, I GO FOR THE STRUGGLING ARTIST OR BRAND, TRYING TO GET THEIR SHIT OFF THE GROUND LIKE ME.  I KNOW, THAT A LOT OF OUR FOLLOWERS, HAVE RESPONSIBILITIES, AND FAMILY, AND OTHER THINGS THAT COME FIRST, BUT, IF YOU CAN'T AFFORD WHAT WE CREATE, ALL WE EVER ASK, IS THAT YOU SIMPLY SPREAD THE WORD.  LOYALTY IS ONE OF THE FOUNDATION TERMS IN OUR BRAND, AND THAT'S WHAT WE NEED.  MONEY COMES AND GOES, BUT, ASIDE FROM A BRAND ITSELF, WE'RE TRYING TO CHANGE THE MINDSET OF PEOPLE.  IMPROVE THEIR LIVES.  IF YOU IDENTIFY, WITH THE THOUGHTS AND IDEAS WE PRODUCE, THEN HELP SPREAD THEM, THAT'S FREE AND LITERALLY TAKES NOTHING. BUT, A HALF-ASSED EFFORT.  WHAT HAPPENS IS A CHAIN REACTION, OR A DOMINO EFFECT, AND EVENTUALLY ON DOWN THE LINE, SOMEONE WILL MAKE A PURCHASE.  UNTIL THEN, I WILL PLAY GOD- STATUS AND KEEP CREATING, BECAUSE, THAT WAS WHAT I WAS BORN TO DO.   - 925